[insert superhero image] You feel compelled to "rescue" others, to "fix" their problems for them. Yougo beyond empathy; you take responsibility for their pain. At the same time, you minimize and invalidate your own pain. You may do this by labeling others' struggles as "more painful" than yours; you play “suffering Olympics” - and you lose every time. When you do try to prioritize your own needs and feelings, you feel guilty. A part of you believes others won't survive without your help.
When you really think about it, your huge efforts to please or help others, or contribute meaningfully to society, are motivated by your tireless effort to justify your existence. You believe that if you can only find a way to be more useful, you will feel more worthy. In the words of Brene Brown, you engage in "thehustle for worthiness."
Excessive Independence/Silencing Vulnerability
[Insert I'm fine lie] Despite being there for others 'at the drop of a hat,' you have a hard time reaching out yourself; the worse you feel, the harder it is. You tend to smile and say you’re fine when you’re not - even with people who you suspect may actually want to know. Deep down, you are afraid that the other person will judge you, dismiss you, make you feel worse. Or, that you will be "too much of a burden." When you do reach out, you tell yourself you are "weak" or "needy." You're just so used to being the strong one!